Okay that’s not actually true. But unfortunately, it’s pretty close to true. What can I say? I’m a shy introvert, through and through.
I’ve had one pair of sunglasses for about six years. They cost three dollars when I bought them, and I fully attribute their longevity to the fact that I live in one of the more overcast places in the country and that I don’t wear contacts. I wear them when I’m really desperate to keep people from approaching me, though, and I tend to have my headphones on as well. Because seriously, who approaches a girl with dark shades and headphones? At a bus stop? While reading a book?
People who are dicks, that’s who.
Like, one time I was on the bus reading. With headphones going. And this guy waved me down–like, walked to a seat in front of me and waved his hand in front of my face until I looked at him (I kept the headphones on). “What are you reading” he asked, and my response was holding my book in front of his face while still reading. People like that are douchebags, and that is the worst way to approach a girl who’s reading.
Anyway. The other day I was leaving a bookstore for an appointment. I was wearing my skull-print dress, brown tights and my studded faux-oxford-shoe-things. I also had my purse on my shoulder and a large moleskine art journal under my arm. Most importantly, I was wearing my headphones and my sunglasses. Why are all these details relevant? An older man stopped me. Like, physically moved in front of me so I couldn’t go around him, and asked if I worked there. I just stopped and stared. Do you work here, he asked again. I couldn’t help it (nor do I think I should have) but the snarkiest “uhhh no” came out of my mouth. My bitchy sixteen year old bratty self would have been so proud.
Because seriously–who does that? He even asked again–so you don’t work here? He looked disappointed. I ignored him and pushed my way past. I mean, even if I did work there, I clearly wasn’t on the clock, so fuck off dude! The help desk is a whopping five feet from where I was standing. No excuse.