My blog is having an existential crisis

Alt title: This is what I wear in the morning when I walk my dog

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A couple of weeks ago, Ellie from Elliequent posted about why she doesn’t allow comments on her blog. She took the post down, citing the (valid) need to edit it over a bit. For what it’s worth, I loved pretty much every bit of it, and it makes me think about whether or not I want to disallow comments. I don’t, because at the end of the day I like the feeling that I belong to a community.

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That being said, I’ve been thinking a lot. Sitting quietly, writing a fair bit, and thinking. My big post, my Grand Reveal of my Mental Illness, was met largely with silence. A few incredibly thoughtful comments, which were much appreciated, but mostly silence. Which in its own way is respectful, especially considering I made it pretty clear I didn’t want this topic to be one dominating conversations with me.Β That’s where the whole allow-don’t-allow-comments thing ties in. Do I let myself get wrapped up in paying attention to comments and reactions? Do I write just to write? Do I cultivate a blog worth reading, or do I let it be an outpouring of what’s actually in my head?

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It’s difficult to come up with things to talk about, though, when that very topic seems to be dominating my life at the moment. I mean, for all intents and purposes, I have a pretty great and very twee life. And if you don’t know what twee means, consider yourself lucky and know that you don’t read enough blogs. Twee is wearing pretty dresses with bright colored tights, it’s instagramming your coffee order and gourmet, homemade egg salad sandwich. Most of the time, that is my life. Which is a disgustingly great life.

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Right now, though, the twee elements is pretty much lacking. I mean, sure, I’m wearing a cute dress and yes, my tights are turquoise. I mean okay it’s a maxi skirt with a deer sweatshirt in the photos. Oh and my sandwich is of the homemade egg salad variety, a photo of which you can find on my instagram account. LikeASmallFire.

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6 thoughts on “My blog is having an existential crisis

  1. Too funny, I received your comment while reading this post. Yay for having a smart phone and a laptop. I’m connected to the max.

    In other news, I totally get where you’re coming from on the commenting/no commenting thing and trying to figure out what you want your space to be. I gotta be honest, I’m actually going through something similar right now. I’ve been offered a TON of free stuff lately and I just don’t want to be that blogger. But, all of the bloggers I love are getting offered the same stuff and they are taking those companies up on their offers and that’s making me dislike their blogs a bit, even though it’s totally their choice. I just can’t help but get annoyed with all the sponsored posts out there these days. There are just too many. It’s more sponsored crap than real, honest posts.

    I hope you know that I love your blog. And the thing that I love about it is you and your writing style and your willingness to write posts like The Allegory. You’re honest, you’re creative, you’re brilliant, and you’re damn stylish. Whether you allow comments or not, whether you change what you write or not, I’ll be around, my friend.

    • Your comment is so nice and for what it’s worth, I wrote an epic reply. That was promptly deleted by The Fates or some such. I wish I could sum it up with a thumbs up, but basically–thank you. You’re one of my favorite readers πŸ™‚ Shh don’t tell the others. Also, if you take on sponsors I would definitely still read you. Especially if you separated out the You posts from the Sponsor posts, or was anything other than OMGCHECKOUTTHESELINKSGUYS, which I don’t see you doing.

    • And I love having you read it πŸ™‚ You (should) know how much I love your opinions and feedback! Also, right back at ya–or should I say write back at yah? Eh? Eh?

  2. Hey, one thing to keep in mind is that you can disable comments for specific posts. For example, if you write a post about X and you don’t really want to deal with comments, you can tell wordpress you don’t want comments for post X, but leave comments enabled for the rest of your blog.

    Also, re: mental illness. It’s a painful subject for many people and even though the internet affords commenters some anonymity, some folks might still not feel a) comfortable sharing info about this or b)they might feel bad saying anything, as it might come off disingenuous since they don’t know the OP. I feel like I fall into group B as I am not good at expressing my feeling with words without sounding like a sycophant or just flat out disingenuous. I was brought up like this: If you can’t say something 100% genuine and from the heart, don’t say anything. This is not the best way to go through life, I know, but it’s how I am 75% of the time.

    Lastly, thanks for introducing me to “twee,” as I had never heard that before. And blogging is, like all of life, about balance. A balance between writing to write, cultivating a name for yourself, carving out your little corner of the internet where you feel comfortable and like yourself, AND writing something that people will want to read.

    • The idea of disabling comments for specific posts is a really good idea–I’ll definitely keep it in mind. It’s not even that I don’t want comments, it’s like the idea that I don’t want the idea, or the expectation of comments. But only sometimes πŸ™‚ And I totally have no intention of writing about mental illness with the intent to pressure people into sharing information about their own experiences–I very much just want to add my voice to the growing community of online bloggers who talk about mental health. I also get that some people don’t feel comfortable talking about or expressing sympathy for mental illness, and that’s kind of the whole point of me writing about it in the first place. I mean, it is uncomfortable, for everyone involved, because it’s such a taboo topic. Which is really unfortunate.

      Mostly, though, I wanted to be able to easily justify why I haven’t been spending a ton of time writing on this thing. Distractions of that sort. πŸ™‚ Thanks for sharing your perspective!

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